Strategies/Techniques To Win The Battle Against Stress

2 Corinthians 10:3-5

For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war after the flesh: (For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds;) Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ;  (Any thought that doesn't line up with the Word of God, don't let it have a place in your heart or mind, and especially don't speak it)

Proverbs 18:20-21

A man's belly shall be satisfied with the fruit of his mouth; and with the increase of his lips shall he be filled. Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.  (Speak ONLY life)

Proverbs 3:5-6

Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.  (No matter how it feels, no matter how impossible the circumstances might seem, trust in HIM and refuse to let your mind ponder it in the natural)

Phillippians 4:4-9

Rejoice in the Lord always: and again I say, Rejoice. Let your moderation be known unto all men. The Lord is at hand. Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. Those things, which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you.  (Even if you "feel" afraid, refuse to let yourself worry.  Meditate ONLY on victorious thoughts and expect God's peace to wash over you)

1 Peter 5:5-11

Yea, all of you be subject one to another, and be clothed with humility: for God resisteth the proud, and giveth grace to the humble. Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time: Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you. Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour: Whom resist stedfast in the faith, knowing that the same afflictions are accomplished in your brethren that are in the world. But the God of all grace, who hath called us unto his eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after that ye have suffered a while, make you perfect, stablish, strengthen, settle you. To him be glory and dominion for ever and ever. Amen.  (You're not the only one who's struggling.  The same struggles you're going through, other believers are going through and have gone through the same struggles; you're not alone.  Keep yourself in a continual state of humility, continue to release your concerns to Jesus, and continue to trust in Him)

Matthew 11:28-30

Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.  (Stay grounded in Jesus.  He IS the anointing, and He wants His anointing to rest upon His children)

Read Joshua 1.  In this account of history, Moses was now dead, and Joshua was expected to take over the ministry (a congregation of 3 million people!).  Joshua knew of all the miracles that God did through Moses (a mighty man of God).  Now the church was basically like "OK, show us what ya got".  He was likely under immense stress at the thought of taking over the leadership of so many people.  God tells him 3 times to "be strong and of good courage", and at the end of chapter 1, and even the men in Joshua's army said they would "only be strong and of good courage".  God KNEW Joshua was scared, but He needed him to be strong, to trust in Him and to do what He said.

Joshua 1

Now after the death of Moses the servant of the Lord it came to pass, that the Lord spake unto Joshua the son of Nun, Moses' minister, saying, Moses my servant is dead; now therefore arise, go over this Jordan, thou, and all this people, unto the land which I do give to them, even to the children of Israel. Every place that the sole of your foot shall tread upon, that have I given unto you, as I said unto Moses. From the wilderness and this Lebanon even unto the great river, the river Euphrates, all the land of the Hittites, and unto the great sea toward the going down of the sun, shall be your coast. There shall not any man be able to stand before thee all the days of thy life: as I was with Moses, so I will be with thee: I will not fail thee, nor forsake thee. Be strong and of a good courage: for unto this people shalt thou divide for an inheritance the land, which I sware unto their fathers to give them. Only be thou strong and very courageous, that thou mayest observe to do according to all the law, which Moses my servant commanded thee: turn not from it to the right hand or to the left, that thou mayest prosper withersoever thou goest. This book of the law shall not depart out of thy mouth; but thou shalt meditate therein day and night, that thou mayest observe to do according to all that is written therein: for then thou shalt make thy way prosperous, and then thou shalt have good success. Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest. Then Joshua commanded the officers of the people, saying, Pass through the host, and command the people, saying, Prepare you victuals; for within three days ye shall pass over this Jordan, to go in to possess the land, which the Lord your God giveth you to possess it. And to the Reubenites, and to the Gadites, and to half the tribe of Manasseh, spake Joshua, saying, Remember the word which Moses the servant of the Lord commanded you, saying, The Lord your God hath given you rest, and hath given you this land. Your wives, your little ones, and your cattle, shall remain in the land which Moses gave you on this side Jordan; but ye shall pass before your brethren armed, all the mighty men of valour, and help them; Until the Lord have given your brethren rest, as he hath given you, and they also have possessed the land which the Lord your God giveth them: then ye shall return unto the land of your possession, and enjoy it, which Moses the Lord's servant gave you on this side Jordan toward the sunrising. And they answered Joshua, saying, All that thou commandest us we will do, and whithersoever thou sendest us, we will go. According as we hearkened unto Moses in all things, so will we hearken unto thee: only the Lord thy God be with thee, as he was with Moses. Whosoever he be that doth rebel against thy commandment, and will not hearken unto thy words in all that thou commandest him, he shall be put to death: only be strong and of a good courage.

Attitude: A Window Into a Child’s Heart

(a re-post from https://thrivingkidsconnection.com/attitude-a-window-into-a-childs-heart)

Getting the job done is important, but what about the rolling eyes or huffing and mumbling? Is a bad attitude inevitable? Sometimes parents excuse the attitude by saying, “At least he did what I asked.” Others use excuses like, “She’s tired,” or “He’s only eight” and ignore the attitudes they see.

Unfortunately attitudes don’t typically get better, they get worse. If the heart is in the wrong place, a crisis is just around the corner. Some parents mistakenly ignore attitudes because their children comply.  Kids need to learn how to respond well to the challenges of life even when they’re unhappy. We all need to do things we don’t want to do and respond positively even though we don’t feel like it.

3 ASPECTS OF AN ATTITUDE

An attitude is more than just the behavior you see. Attitudes are heart issues that have developed from several factors including emotions and thinking errors. Emotions, like frustration, disappointment, and anger, are complicated. Jealousy, pride, and discouragement are likely to reveal themselves inappropriately as well. Often the bad attitude you see in a child is just the tip of the iceberg with complicated and intense emotions swirling around just under the surface.

Thinking errors contribute to bad attitudes as well. Children may believe that just because they’re unhappy they have the right to display that misery to those around them. Furthermore, a child may believe that the workload he has is unreasonable. Your daughter may believe that homework is a waste of time. Another child may think that if his brother is being annoying, he has the right to punch him. Children typically have misperceptions about life leading to thinking errors that result in bad attitudes.

Part of our job as parents is to help children respond appropriately to emotions and to change what they believe about life. One of the ways you’ll do that is by challenging bad attitudes, since bad attitudes are the flag, indicating a heart problem.

Some parents make the mistake of using their own emotions to overpower their kids, believing that, because this child is wrong, then the anger is warranted. In that case, often the parent’s own attitude is revealed, requiring some adjustments in emotional management and a change in thinking.

The reality is that emotional intensity hinders closeness and, just because you’re right in addressing a bad attitude, that doesn’t mean that your anger is a good strategy for dealing with it.

FIRMNESS IS ONE PART OF THE SOLUTION

So can we put aside our own anger, and still be firm? The answer is yes. Let’s remind ourselves that firmness doesn’t mean harshness. You might calmly say, “Wait a minute. Stop right there. Don’t take the trash out. You need to sit down and think about your attitude. I know you have other things to do in life, and you’re disappointed that I asked you to help out here, but you need to be willing to contribute to the family. So sit down and think about it and come back to talk to me when you’re ready.” In this way you challenge a child’s thinking and you check the emotional reaction to raise awareness of a poor response. Having the child take a break gives opportunity to settle down and change the heart.

Of course, changing attitudes takes much time and work, so don’t give up. It’s usually best to sit down with a child at a non-discipline time to talk about attitudes and how they affect the relational atmosphere in a home. When you begin to open dialogue with a child about attitudes, you might point out that attitudes make a statement even though they don’t usually have words. Attitudes are revealed in tone of voice, posture, grunts, sighs, and unkind looks.

An attitude often gives a message that says, “I’m angry with you.” Or “It isn’t fair that I have to do so much work.” Or “How dare you interrupt me before I get to the next level on my video game.”

After a child has settled down from a bad attitude, it’s often helpful to discuss the message the child was communicating. “Son, you were obviously unhappy when I was trying to help you with your homework. What was going on there?”

Even if a child can’t form feelings into words at the moment, your brainstorming session often raises the awareness of non-verbal communication. You’re then helping your child to think about how to better communicate next time.

If you regularly talk to your child about attitudes and reflect on poor emotional responses by debriefing, then your child will likely begin to choose different responses. You might even discuss scriptures together about people who had good attitudes compared to those who had bad attitudes.

For example, Cain had a bad attitude toward correction so God confronted him in Genesis 4:6-7 by saying, “Why are you angry? Why is your face downcast? If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must master it.”

BAD ATTITUDES ARE A HEART ISSUE

The same thing is true when children allow their anger to fester. A bad attitude sets a child up to make a poor choice, hurt others, or think selfishly about a situation. When a child responds poorly to a limit you set, an instruction you give, or to correction, then sin is waiting to pounce.

The battle within is an important one for children to understand. Some kids have no idea that they’re wrestling with desires inside. They just freely express their disappointment and many times do it in hurtful ways. The reality is that mature and healthy people put limits on their reactions and choose to do what’s right instead.

Be careful that you don’t just correct for a bad attitude but also look for ways to encourage a positive one. Offer praise for a good attitude under pressure by describing internal strength, not simply right actions.

It’s not hard to show joy or excitement when things are going well. But it’s a real sign of maturity for a child to demonstrate contentment or cooperation in the face of a challenging situation. As you work with your child in the attitude department, you’ll be training and equipping your child for life.